But here’s the thing….

Since September 11, 2001, terrorists have killed an average 24 Americans per year, almost all of them in Iraq and Afghanistan. Which are war zones. The number of Americans killed by terrorists on U.S. soil between 2002 and 2012? Zero.

Now, if we really want to get serious about stopping deaths from weird, exotic sources, perhaps we should be focusing our attention and national treasure on these 10 killers:

—————————————-

1. Falling furniture. While being crushed by a falling safe or grand piano remains (for the most part) the stuff of Road Runner cartoons, falling TVs, book shelves and, yes, runaway pianos, remain a clear and present danger. According to the Consumer Products Safety Commission, 293 Americans fell victim to falling furniture between 2000 and 2010. Which makes Ikea even more dangerous than al Qaeda.

"Safe"? Oh, the irony.

2. Insect stings. Killer bees! Killer bees! Killer bees! Despite the apocalyptic warnings of 1970s-era entomologists, America has not been overrun by swarms of homicidal Africanized honeybees. However, an average of 40 Americans die every year as the result of anaphylactic shock brought about by stings from bees, wasps and hornets.

Forget assault rifles. Time to stock up on Raid!

3. Hot Dogs. On average, 70 Americans die every year from choking on hot dogs. One 28-year-old woman just died thusly at Chicago’s Wrigley Field. Which makes Oscar Mayer Public Enemy Number 8 — at the very least.

If the choking doesn't get ya, the colon cancer will.

4. Real Dogs. Fido kills an average 30 Americans a year. Man’s best friend indeed.

"Cujo was a pussy!"

5. Deer. They look so sweet and, oh, I don’t know, doe-eyed. But they kill some 130 Americans annually, usually by jumping in front of our cars when we least suspect it.

Bambi's Revenge

6. Lightning. You’ve heard that you’re more likely to be struck by lightning than killed by a terrorist? Turns out, you’re WAY more likely. According to NOAA, lighting kills an average 51 Americans annually. The state where you’re most likely to be hit by a bolt from the blue? Wyoming.

Coincidence? I don't think so!

7. Autoerotic Asphyxiation. It kills an average 500-1,000 American males annually. Should this happen to you, you will have no one to blame but yourself.

Don't try this at home.

8.Bad Medicine. Forget airplanes, foreign embassies or crowded sporting events. The one place you’re REALLY likely to die is the hospital, where medical screw-ups account for an estimated 100,000 deaths annually.

You know what they call the guy who graduates last in his class in medical school? Doctor!

9. Brain-Eating Parasites. According to the CDC, a microscopic brain parasite called taxoplasma gondii has infected 22.5 percent of Americans over 25. And it kills 375 Americans annually, eating their brains from the inside out.

You know when you get a song stuck in your head and you can't get it out? That's an earworm.

10. Clowns. It’s not not exactly how many Americans are killed by clowns every year. The government is very tight-lipped with these figures. We know Chicago’s infamous bozo John Wayne Gacy killed 33 young men and boys back in the 1970s, and after that, the subject’s been off-limits to the mainstream media. Like UFOs and the Mothman. We may not be able to prove a cover-up, but it sure smells funny.

So why isnt the Department of Homeland Security looking into THIS guy?

Happy Friday.

Happy Weekend.

And Happy Mother’s Day!

]]> http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/05/10/10-things-way-more-dangerous-than-terrorists/feed/ 0 http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/05/03/capital-idea-10-fun-facts-about-washington-d-c/ http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/05/03/capital-idea-10-fun-facts-about-washington-d-c/#comments Fri, 03 May 2013 17:25:51 +0000 allen http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/?p=2647 If polls are to be trusted — and I’m afraid they are — most Americans hold a pretty dim view of Washington, D.C. Even the people who live and work there don’t seem too enamored with the place, considering how quickly Congressfolks leave town whenever they get the chance.

But today, attention must be paid to The Federal City. For it was on this day, May 3rd, in the year 1802, that Washington was officially incorporated as a city. So happy 211th birthday, District of Columbia!

You don't look a day over 197!

Construction of our national’s capital had actually begun 11 years earlier, having been authorized by Congress under Article 1, Section 8, of the U.S. Constitution. The location on the banks of the Potomac River was chosen by Thomas Jefferson and Alexander Hamilton as part of a compromise deal under which the federal government would pay all the individual states’ Revolutionary War debts (which favored the North) in exchange for locating the city south of the Mason-Dixon Line (which favored the South).

The city hadn't even been built and already they were buying votes.

Why build a capital city from the ground up in the first place? Because the Founding Fathers didn’t trust any one state to defend the federal government in the event of attack by enemies foreign…or domestic. (Amazing how much has changed in 225 years — ha-ha.)

In honor of our capital city’s 211th anniversary of incorporation, let’s retire to a smoke-filled room, cozy up with our favorite lobbyist and chow down on a steaming plate of federal pork as we take a Friday Fun Facts look at Washington, D.C.

——————————–

* Washington, D.C. is one of three world capitals built entirely by federal contractors. The other two cities are Brasilia, Brazil, and Canberra, Australia.

Federal oversight explains why the city is so well designed.

* There are no skyscrapers in Washington D.C. Some believe there’s a law that prohibits any building from being taller than the Capitol. Not true. The height restriction stems from a 1910 law prohibiting buildings from being any taller than the width of the adjacent street, plus 20 feet. The intent was to specifically prohibit tall buildings civic leaders felt would corrupt the city’s classic Jeffersonian feel.

The restriction also favors real estate companies who rent out office space -- which now costs as much as in downtown Manhattan!

* Washington D.C. is dotted with parks that impede the flow of traffic. Which is exactly their point. The city’s 19th century architects placed the parks at inconvenient locations to serve as impediments to any army invading from the water.

They worked so well during the War of 1812.

*Washington D.C. is home to 74 museums, including the Smithsonian Air & Space Museum, the most heavily visited museum in the world!

Take THAT, Louvre!

* A 2007 study by the Brookings Institution named Washington, D.C. “America’s Most Walkable City.”

It's also the most swimmable!

* The city has 1 lawyer for every 19 residents, and 74 lobbyists for every Senator.

Washington also has the highest per-capita wine consumption of any American state. No doubt from all those lobbyists greasing up those thirsty Senators.

* Washington D.C. averages 39 inches of rainfall per year — an inch more than Seattle’s 38.

It also produces more buls**t than Texas and Oklahoma combined.

* The National Mall is 1.4 times larger than Vatican City.

But, no, you can't shop there.

* Most of Washington’s streets are named for letters and numbers. But there is no “J” Street. Why? Because in Colonial times, the letters “J” and “I” were interchangeable. “J” was not yet a fully recognized letter.

Which was bad news for Thomas Iefferson.

* The Lincoln Memorial was designed to resemble the Athen’s Parthenon.

Just don't tell Lincoln the actual Parthenon was built by -- wait for it -- slaves.

Happy Friday, and have a great weekend!

And today is the 32nd anniversary of the computer mouse’s introduction to the American consumer market!

(Hard to believe the mouse, as know it, is as old as former Tampa Bay Devil Rays outfielder [2004-2006] Joey Gathright – most recently playing for the minor league Bridgeport Bluefish — also born 32 years today. )

Happy Birthday, Joey!

In honor of this auspicious anniversary, here are 10 amazing Fun Facts about the computer mouse!

———————————–

1. The computer mouse traces its lineage back to the trackball, invented in 1952 by three Canadians working for that country’s Digital Automated Tracking the Resolving (DATAR) project. The machine used an actual Canadian five-pin bowling ball to track its motion. Its inventors were unable to patent the trackball concept because DATAR was a military project, and therefore its existence was supposed to be top secret.

Should the device fail in combat, you could always just throw the bowling ball at the enemy.

2. Unaware of the top-secret Canadian project, Stanford University’s Douglas Engelbart developed his own electronic pointing device in 1963. Unlike the machine from the Great White North, Englebart’s used two wheels, not a ball, to track movement, and was small enough to be held in one hand. Because the device had a long wire running out the back — a wire that resembled a rodent’s tail — Englebart dubbed his invention a “mouse.”

Can also be used for slicing pizza!

3. Englebart also experimented with electronic pointing devices attached to the user’s chin or nose, but ultimately went with his handheld version because — well — the others made you look silly.

In an alternate universe, this is how we control our PCs.

4. In 1968 Germany’s Telefunken developed a hand-held trackball called a “Rollkugel” (“Rolling Ball”) it sold as a separate accessory for its TR-44 computer. It gained little traction on this side of the Atlantic. (“Traction” — get it?)

Rollkugel.

5. In the late 1970s, Xerox PARC (Palo Alto Research Center) melded the mouse and trackball concepts along with the then-nascent Graphic User Interface (GUI) to create an integrated personal computer system it hoped to market to American businesses. Xerox’s Star 8010 made its official debut on April 26, 1981, and the “computer mouse” was officially introduced to American computer users.

And America -- yawned.

6. In 1982, Microsoft developed the first PC-compatible mouse to work with its new Microsoft Word word processing program. Two years later, Steve Jobs made a mouse — a concept he’d first seen at Xerox PARC — an integral part of his revolutionary Apple Macintosh home computer system. Apple’s product was the American public’s first widespread encounter with the “mouse” concept. And it was the reason PC magazine columnist John C. Dvorak predicted the Apple Macintosh would fail, writing, “There’s no evidence that people want to use these things.”

Apple's original mouse fit squarely in the palm of your hand. And we mean SQUARE. Thank goodness Steve Jobs loved rounded corners.

7. The first scroll wheel was introduced in 1995 by a company called, appropriate enough Mouse Systems. But it would not become popular until Microsoft released its scroll-wheel mouse the following year.

Not that Microsoft would steal the idea or anything....

8. Acceptance of the computer mouse took many years — and is still not universal. Over the years, upstart companies have tried to market various alternative pointing devices, such as electronic pens and gloves.

If you pick your nose with this thing, you can blow your brains out.

9. Although Apple long preferred the one-button mouse, products with as many as 18 buttons have been marketed over the years.

Lord knows what kind of mutant hand would be necessary to operate this.

10 . According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the plural of “mouse” is “mice”. Or “mouses.” Whatever the hell you want it to be.

Moose?

Happy Friday! And have a great weekend!

"Mouses! Hmmmmmm."

American history is rife with bombing incidents. Some have been seemingly random, others highly targeted. If they have anything in common, it’s that bombings have mostly been, one way or the other, politically motivated. While gun-wielding mass killers like those we saw at Columbine, the Aurora movie theater and Newtown tend to be acting out deep-seated, often petty personal issues, bombers tend to hold grievances against institutions and see high explosives as a way of making a profound social statement. (What, they never heard of blogging?)

How common are bombings? With one of the Boston bombers now confirmed killed by the FBI and the second on the run, let’s hunker down for a Friday Fun Facts look at the Top 10 Bombings in U.S. History:

———————

Haymarket Square, Chicago (May 1, 1886) - In spring 1886, thousands of Chicago’s industrial workers — many of them European immigrants — went on strike for higher wages and a five-day work week (Gasp!). When cops moved in to break up a labor rally in the city’s Haymarket Square, someone threw a dynamite bomb at the police line. In the resulting melee and riot, seven police officers and four strikers were killed, dozens more wounded. Eight “anarchists” were later convicted of conspiracy in the bombing, seven of whom were sentenced to death. On the upside, the incident established “May Day” as the international day for pro-labor demonstrations.

Gee, just think what would have happened if they'd be protesting against Obamacare!

Los Angeles Times Building (October 1, 1910) – In the early 20th Century, not only was the Los Angeles Times militantly anti-union, but its publisher, Harrison Gray Otis, was head the city’s Merchants and Manufacturers Association, which was committed to keeping unions out of the L.A. basin. During a dispute between local businesses and the Iron Workers union, labor organizers James and John McNamara planted a bomb at the Times’ downtown HQ, hoping to send Mr. Otis a “message.” The resulting explosion and fire killed 21 newspaper employees and injured 100 more. While James served life in prison, his brother was released after 15 years and returned to the local labor movement.

"Sorry, folks. No 'Doonesbury' this Sunday."

Wall Street, Manhattan (September 16, 1920) – At high noon, a horse-drawn wagon pulled up in front of the J.P. Morgan headquarters on Wall Street. Inside were 100 lbs. of dynamite and 500 lbs. of iron sash-weights. One minute later, the dynamite exploded, sending deadly iron shrapnel flying in all directions, killing and maiming man and animal alike. In all, 38 people died and 143 were seriously wounded. Ironically, most of the victims weren’t Wall Street big wigs (certainly the intended targets), but messengers and lower-level office employees out on their lunch hour. No arrests were ever made, but many officials believed Italian “anarchists” were behind the plot designed to strike at the heart of American capitalism.

And yet I can't help thinking about the poor horse...

Bath Consolidated School, Bath, Michigan (May 18, 1927) – Like many communities throughout early 20th century America, Bath — an unincorporated community 10 miles northeast of Lansing — decided to merge its many one-room schoolhouses into a single modern, multi-grade building. To pay for this new building, the township raised property taxes on local homeowners. Not everyone was happy with this. One particular tax-protester was, ironically, school board treasurer Andrew Kehoe, who decided to voice his displeasure by ringing the new school with high explosives. Only one of Kehoe’s bombs actually went off, but it managed to bring down the school’s north wing, killing 45 people and injuring 58, most of them children. It remains the deadliest school attack in U.S. history.

No word on what Kehoe did when Bath raised taxes again to pay for building reconstruction.

The “Mad Bomber”, New York Area (1940-1957) - One of the few “serial bombers” in U.S. history, George Metesky was a former Consolidated Edison worker who became permanently disabled with respiratory problems after a 1931 boiler accident filled with lungs with hot, steaming gases. When his disability claims against the company were rejected — Edison said he waited too long to file — Metesky went on a 16-year-old campaign of vengeance against the utility with targets that included Grand Central Station, Radio City Music Hall and the New York Subway (The actual rail system, not the sandwich shop). In all, Metesky planted 33 bombs, 22 of which exploded, injuring 15. Miraculously, no one was killed in any of the blasts. In one of the first successful cases of suspect “profiling,” Metesky was arrested in 1957, and ultimately sent to a mental hospital.

Just don't call him "Crazy Eyes."

Sterling Hall , University of Wisconsin, Madison (August 24, 1970) – Anti-Vietnam War protests were at their peak, and nowhere were the protestors more vehement than in Madison (“Mad-Town”), Wisconsin. One particular focus of student ire was the Army Mathematics Research Center (AMRC) in Sterling Hall, which was doing logistical work for the war effort. In the early morning hours of August 24, 1970, Karlelton “Karl” Armstrong, his younger brother Dwight Armstrong, David Fine and Leo Burt parked a stolen Ford Econoline van packed with ammonium nitrate and fuel oil connected to a timer in front of Sterling Hall and fled. They believed the building was empty. It wasn’t. Robert Fassnacht, a 33-year-old postdoctoral researcher investigating superconductivity, was in the basement lab conducting experiments when the bomb went off. He was instantly killed. Three other people, all maintenance workers, were injured. Much of the Physics Department was destroyed, and thousands of hours of research was lost. Ironically, the Army Math offices were barely touched. AMRC was back in business with 24 hours, developing more advanced algorithms with which to kill the Viet Cong.

After serving their prison sentences, the Armstrong brothers would return to Madison and open a corner deli called, appropriately, "Radical Rye." True story.

The Unabomber, Various (1978-1995) – Another “serial bomber” in the George Metesky tradition, Theodore “Ted” Kaczynski was motivated not by personal injury but by a generalized rage against modernity itself. From a Spartan one-room cabin in the woods outside Lincoln, Montana, this former math prodigy fashioned 16 package-bombs he mailed to various universities and airlines (hence Un-A-Bomber) he believed were helping destroy the environment. His mail-bombs killed three and injured 23. In a 1995 letter, he promised to cease his terror campaign if the New York Times or Washington Post would print his rambling manifesto, Industrial Society and its Future, which the FBI encouraged them to do, hoping someone would recognize his writing style. As it turns out, Ted’s younger brother, David, did just that. Which was not good for Ted.

Ultimately, the manhunt came down to anti-government math whiz Ted Kaczynski or Olympian Mark Spittz.

TWA Terminal, LaGuardia Airport, New York (December 29, 1975) – A bomb hidden in a terminal locker killed 11 people and injured 75. Radical Puerto Rican, Palestinian and Croatian groups were all suspected, but no one was ever charged.

"What about Libyans? You forgot about Libyans!"

World Trade Center, Manhattan (February 26, 1993) – In 1993, a half dozen Islamic terrorists financed by al Qaeda’s Khaled Sheikh Mohammed conspired to set a massive bomb off in the subterranean parking garage of the World Trade Center’s North Tower. Their intent was to topple the North Tower into the South Tower, bringing both down, killing thousands of people in the process. The plan didn’t quite work as planned. The 1,336-lbs. urea-nitrate-gas-enhanced truck-bomb did manage to kill six people and injure more than 1,000, but the Towers didn’t fall. In a particularly cruel twist, the jury in a subsequent liability suit brought by the victims’ families held the New York Port Authority 68 percent responsible for the bombings, the terrorists just 32 percent.

And who did they blame for this one? The Wright Brothers?

Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building, Oklahoma City (April 19, 1995) – This is the one that put domestic terrorism on the map. Anti-government whackos and militia sympathizers Timothy McVeigh, Terry Nichols, Michael Fortier and his wife, Lori Fortier, decided to voice their displeasure with the Justice Department’s handling of the Waco Siege (1992) and Ruby Ridge assault (1992) by filling a rented Ryder truck with forty 50-lb. bags of ammonium nitrate and three 55-gallon drums of nitromethane and parking it in front of the Alfred Murrah Federal Building in downtown Oklahoma City. The resulting blast killed 168 people, including 19 children under the age of six. In addition, it wounded 680, damaged 324 buildings in a 16-block radius and shattered glass in another 258 structures. McVeigh, who had driven the truck, was arrested within 90 minutes, having been stopped for driving a car without license plates. He was executed via lethal injection on June 11, 2001. Nichols is serving life in prison while the Fortiers — who testified against their compatriots — have disappeared into the Witness Protection Program.

Within seven years, this would inspire a sequence in an "X-Files" movie.

As of this writing, the remaining Boston Bombing suspect, 19-year-old Dzhokar Tsarnaev, remains at large while all of Boston is under complete lockdown. His father, now living in Russia, says his sons are “angels” and vows revenge if the younger man is killed. This is sounding more and more like a Liam Neeson movie.

Have a great weekend.

* Not all tax-filers are tax-payers. About half don't make enough money to pay income tax. Or they're rich enough to have really good accountants.

Now, $3.8 trillion is a lot to wrap your mind around. Even breaking spending down by government department or agency can cause serious vertigo.

To better appreciate where your tax dollars go, perhaps it would be more useful to look at the cost of 10 random goods and services Washington regularly purchases. Once you get a grip on these, simply extrapolate this spending by a few hundred billion or so. Then it will all make sense.

Ready? Great! Then let’s take our Friday Fun Facts look at What Things Cost.

——————————–

1. The median salary for an FDA food inspector is $36,150.

Plus they get to take home all the tainted hamburger meat they want!

2. A single B-2 Stealth bomber costs $737 million.

By contrast, Time-Warner will rent you Wonder Woman's "Invisible Jet" for just $375/hour. If you can find it.

3. Those “FBI” emblazoned “storm jackets” our Special Agents wear when busting terrorist cells or kidnapper hideouts are a bargain at around $70.00 each.

And "seconds" cost just $35.99 -- if you don't mind wearing "FIB."

4. National park rangers make an average $25,160 to $37,740 per year.

As opposed to U.S. Army Rangers, whose base salary is just $17,611 -- but who are allowed to kill you.

5. It costs $0.0241 to make a penny.

Add $2,576 for the chiropractic services needed after you bend down to pick one up.

6. The 700-mile-long U.S./Mexico border fence has so far cost $3 billion.

And it's worth every $0.0241 penny!

7. National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) weather satellites cost between$7 billion and $9 billion apiece.

And they're not monitoring your Twitter feeds. Honestly.

8. “Backscatter” X-ray machines, such as those used by the TSA at major airports, cost a minimum $250,000 apiece.

And they're not laughing at your "junk." Honestly.

9. It costs the government $0.92 to generate a Social Security check. Which is why the Social Security Administration has stopped printing checks and is going 100% direct deposit.

Call me old fashioned, but I still prefer my payments in gold bullion.

10. A single Hellfire missile costs $58,000.00.

Or about the same as one year's salary for a teacher in the Los Angeles Unitifed School District. But which one makes a bigger bang on impact?

Happy Friday — and don’t forget to file your taxes!

]]> http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/04/12/what-things-cost/feed/ 0 http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/04/05/how-to-you-solve-a-problem-like-korea/ http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/04/05/how-to-you-solve-a-problem-like-korea/#comments Fri, 05 Apr 2013 16:05:35 +0000 allen http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/?p=2532 If you live on the West Coast — and about 35 million of us do — you can’t help but get a little nervous when a 28-year-old North Korean Cabbage Patch Kid authorizes his military to start lobbing nukes at the United States. Not that the so-called “Hermit Kingdom” actually has nuclear weapons small enough to be carried on ICBMs, or even has the rocket technology necessary to launch such weapons far and accurately enough to hit the Magic Kingdom. It’s just that the kid is so — hostile. I mean, what did we ever do to him? Besides sending him Dennis Rodman?

This Means War!

North Korea’s sabre-rattling may only be designed to rally internal support for the newly installed Beloved Leader, but it’s being taken seriously enough by Washington for it to send a squadron of F-22 stealth fighters and a guided missile cruiser capable of shooting down outbound rockets to the Korean peninsula. Could this situation escalate into a full-blown war? Well, look what happened a few years ago when a certain Middle Eastern despot didn’t even try to threaten us with weapons he didn’t even have.

"So much for this year's 'Taste of Baghdad' festival."

So as we patiently wait for The Korean War Part Duex to premiere, let’s grab a bowl of kimchi, fire up the Samsung HDTV and pop in an old M*A*S*H DVD as we take a Friday Fun Facts look at North Korea.

———————————-

* Korea was an independent “empire” until 1910, when the Japanese showed its empire was bigger than their empire by annexing the whole damned peninsula. After WWII, the victorious United States and the equally victorious Soviet Union kicked the Japanese out and took the land mass for themselves, dividing it up 50/50, north and south. The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (North) and the Republic of Korea (South) — which really was democratic — were formally established by U.N. edict in 1948. Within two years, North Korean soldiers — backed by their Soviet sponsors — were streaming across the border in an attempt to “reunify” the country under Communist leadership.

This was the first of several 20th Century "proxy" wars, which allowed the US and USSR to battle it out without anyone actually getting hurt.

* North Korea’s climate is generally lousy. Winters tend to be long and bitter cold because of its proximity to Siberia. Summers, by contrast, tend to be hot and humid, tempered by the occasional typhoon thanks to currents that drive hot moist air up from the South Pacific. Springs are characterized by severe drought followed by severe flooding. (The country does have one temperate season….normally September 6th–8th. Plan your vacation now!)

One million North Koreans huddle together for warmth.

* Since its founding in 1948, North Korea has had only one president – Kim Il-sung. During his active tenure, Kim managed to survive Joseph Stalin by 40 years, Mao Zedong by 20 years, and outlast six South Korean presidents, 10 U.S. presidents, fourteen British Prime Ministers and 21 Japanese prime ministers. Oh, yeah, Kim died in 1994, but having been declared North Korea’s “Eternal President” that year, he’s still considered to hold that office.

And HE's still the King of Rock 'n' Roll!

* Upon his death in 1994, Kim Il-sung’s power and authority passed to his crazy son, Kim Jong-il and then, in early 2011, to his even crazier grandson, Kim Jong-un. Kim Jong-il was noted for his obsession with Western movies and fine cognac. Kim Jong-un is known for his obsession with American basketball and fervent wish to turn all of North America into a glowing radioactive wasteland.

The Kims

* Although North Korea has been called “the world’s last remaining Stalinist state,” the country is not officially Stalinist. It’s not even officially Communist. (The “C” word was removed from the country’s constitution in 2009.) Instead North Korea practices an ideology called “Juche,” which means, “self-reliance.” The Kims have believed North Korea should grow and prosper by growing its own food, extracting its own resources, manufacturing its own goods, trading with itself, cutting itself off from all communication with the outside world and, when things go horribly wrong, blaming the American government.

Kinda like the Unibomber -- only with nukes.

* North Korea has one of the highest literacy rates in the world, estimated to be 99%.

Typical North Korean reading material.

* North Koreans have no private Internet access and can only view state-TV, which is non-stop government propaganda.

Except for weekends between 2 a.m. and 5 a.m., when it's non-top infomercials.

* On a per capita basis, North Korea is the most militarized nation on earth, with one in 25 citizens serving in the armed forces. The country spends 30% of its GDP on its military, compared to just 3.7% for the United States.

With no food in the country, what else are you going to spend your money on? Beer?

* North Korea ranks second to last on the World Press Freedom Index. Only Eritrea is worse — wherever that is.

Thank you.

* North Korea is rapidly becoming Hollywood’s favorite supervillain, supplanting even Arab terrorists. North Koreans have played the “bad guy” role in such films as Die Another Day (2002), Stealth (2005) and Salt (2010) as well as this year’s remake of Red Dawn and Olympus Has Fallen.

If North Korea really does attack, we can always count on these guys.

Have a great weekend! And you might want to stock up on bottled water…..

]]> http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/04/05/how-to-you-solve-a-problem-like-korea/feed/ 0 http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/29/for-better-or-worse/ http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/29/for-better-or-worse/#comments Fri, 29 Mar 2013 15:02:04 +0000 allen http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/?p=2512 During this past week, there’s been a LOT of talk about gay marriage. The issue was argued not once, but twice, before nothing less than the United States Supreme Court. Demonstrations for against gay marriage were held throughout this great land. Even Facebook got into the act by encouraging participants to change their profile picture to a gay marriage icon.

Gay Marriage Icons.

On the pro-side of the gay marriage argument, proponents say that, this being America, gay men and women should have the same rights as everyone else, including the fundamental right to marry the person they love.

On the con-side, DOMA and Prop 8 backers say that gay marriage threatens to undermine the sanctity of the centuries-old institution of marriage itself. Plus, if people can marry anyone they want, what’s to prevent them from marrying a goat?

If you can find a goat who can say "I do," I say, go for it!

Left out of this gay marriage debate has been the meaning, value and future of marriage itself. Sure, it’s a great way to minimize estate taxes, but what other benefits does it provide? To society? To individuals? To divorce lawyers? And just how “traditional” is this “traditional marriage” of which so many now speak anyway?

To find out, let’s call the wedding planner, line up a good florist, hire the minister/priest/rabbi/imam of your choice and write an iron-clad pre-nup as we take Friday Fun Facts look at marriage.

—————————————————————————–

* Conservatives are fond of saying that marriage is traditionally defined as the union of one man and one woman. Actually, in the scope of human history, marriage is traditionally defined as the union of one man and as many women he can get/support. Polygamy is as old as humanity itself, particularly in cultures where warfare tends to limit the number of available, i.e. “living” males. The Old Testament Patriarchs — Abraham, Issac and Jacob — were all practicing polygamists. King Solomon reportedly had 700 wives and 300 concubines. (Because 1,000 is such a nice round number.) Even today, when the practice is illegal, fundamentalist Mormons continue to practice the sacrament of “plural marriage.”

Guess which one gets to take out the garbage?

* Same-sex marriage was legal in ancient Rome. Historians believe it was practiced commonly there until Christianity become the official state religion late in the 4th century A.D.

And even then....

* The idea of marrying for love is actually only a few hundred years old. For most of human history, marriage was an economic contract designed to help men acquire property, forge alliances with other families, create capital (in the form of children/laborers) and even end political conflicts. Fathers with girls often had to pay male suitors in the form of a “dowry” just to take the useless females off their hands.

"Take my daughter...please!"

* Also, for most of human history, marriages were arranged by the families involved, often with the help of a professional “matchmaker.” This continues to be common practice in countries like India…where the divorce rate is, ironically, only 1.1%.

Obviously, she's on to something.

* The age at which Americans marry — at least for the first time — has been rising steadily. In 1950, it was 22.8 for males, 20.3 for females. Today it’s 28.2 for men and 26.1 for women.

The median age for the first divorce? 32.0 for men, 30.1 for women.

* The more educated you are, the longer you’re likely to wait before getting married. Currently, Massachusetts, home to Harvard University, Boston College and M.I.T., is number-one in late first marriages. (Everyone is too busy writing their doctoral dissertations.) Utah, home of Brigham Young University and Provo College, is number-one in early nuptials.

Where everyone is busy NOT having sex.

* Not only are more Americans waiting longer to get married, but a rising number of them are not even doing it at all. As of 2010, only 51 percent of people over 18 — that’s just a tick over one half — were married. That’s down from 72 percent in 1960.

Quick! Legalize same-sex marriage before married people become an oppressed minority!

* If you still want to get married, don’t live with your intended first. The probability of divorce within 10 years is 33 percent if you didn’t live together first. If you did, the probability nearly doubles to 62 percent.

Because cohabitation gives you even MORE time for the other person to drive you completely nuts.

* According to research from Wake Forest University, marriage does more to promote life satisfaction than does money, children or sex.

Because it's really difficult to have sex when you're in separate bathtubs.

* Elderly married people live longer than elderly singles, probably because married folks are more likely to maintain healthy habits like eating properly, exercising, not smoking, eating breakfast and taking their medications.

"I hope you remembered to take your blue pill today!"

Give your significant other a hug — and have a great weekend!

]]> http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/29/for-better-or-worse/feed/ 0 http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/22/let-my-people-go/ http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/22/let-my-people-go/#comments Fri, 22 Mar 2013 16:39:53 +0000 allen http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/?p=2488 Passover begins this Monday night at sundown. Called Pesach in Hebrew, this eight day festival commemorates the liberation of the Hebrew slaves from Egyptian bondage some 3,300 years ago. The particulars surrounding this holiday — Moses, the Burning Bush, the 10 Plagues, the Parting of the Red Sea, etc. — are detailed in the Old Testament Book of Exodus, as well as in the classic 1956 Hollywood spectacular directed by Cecil B. DeMille and starring Charlton Heston.

"You can have have this staff when you take it from my cold dead hands!"

The Exodus and how it eventually laid the foundation for three of the world’s great religions — Judaism, Christianity and Islam — has been rich fodder for historians. How much of the story is true, and how much is fabrication? Can science explain the many “miracles” contained in the epic narrative, or must be accept the story on faith alone?

And did Moses really belt Stephen Schwartz songs?

As we prepare to celebrate Passover — and the associated Easter holiday that likewise celebrates “rebirth” — let’s break out the matzohs, cook up some chicken soup and open our haggadahs (reading right to left) as we take a Friday Fun Facts look at the Exodus.

—————————————

Pharaoh. In popular cultural — more or less codified by the deMille movie — Seti I is the Pharaoh who orders the slaying of all first-born Hebrew children and his son, Ramses II, is the brutal ruler and step-brother with whom Moses squares off over the fate of the remaining Hebrews’ long-term employment prospects. But here’s the thing: The Bible never actually identifies the guy. He’s just called “Pharaoh.” Historians aren’t sure who was left holding the bag when the Hebrews blew town, but most agree on one thing: It sure as hell wasn’t Ramses II, whose reign occurred much later than the likely date of the Exodus. Up to 15 alternate Pharaohs have been suggested, including Amenemhat IV, Thutmose III, Merneptah and Setnakhte.

Probably not one of these guys.

Pyramid Schemes. In re-telling the Exodus narrative, many storytellers are fond of showing Hebrew slaves building the pyramids. Historians note that these grand monuments were completed centuries before the Hebrews could have arrived in Egypt — if they ever did at all.

Hell, we know the pyramids were really built by aliens!

“Once we were slaves in Egypt…” Hmmm, probably not. Although the Egyptians were meticulous record-keepers, archeologists have found no documents referring to a large population of monotheistic slaves living in Egypt at any time. (Some evidence suggests Hebrews might have worked as hired laborers or even military mercenaries, but not in particularly large numbers.) Certainly, had so many slaves left at once — the Bible’s count is about 600,000 — it would have devastated the Egyptian economy. And we have no records of such an economic catastrophe having occurred.

And not one of them was circumcised!

Holy Moses! Historically? Probably not a real guy. The prevailing theory among biblical historians today is that the “Moses” figure is an amalgam of several priests, teachers, political figures and Egyptian refugees whose stories helped unite the monotheistic Canaanites during the end of the Bronze Age.

Moses figure.

The 10 Plagues. They were probably for real! But they were not the acts of a wrathful God…unless you want to blame God for Global Warming. Climatologists have recently unearthed strong evidence that points to a major climate shift in the Egyptian capital of Pi-Ramses at the end of the reign of Ramses II. (Yes, that Ramses.) An extended period of hot, dry weather likely caused the Nile to dry up, giving rise to a bloom of Burgundy Blood algae (the “blood” plague), followed naturally by infestations of frogs, lice, flies and all the diseases they carry. At the same time, the volcano Thera on the nearby Greek island of Santorini is known to have exploded, which would have caused the plague of darkness, the flaming hail and perhaps even caused the withdrawal of water from the “Reed Sea” (not “Red Sea”) and subsequent tsunami that climaxes any telling of this tale.

And in Egypt, you don't need to enslave Hebrews to get yourself the occasional plague of locusts.

40 Years in the Desert. If 600,000 escaped slaves and their offspring did spend 40 years wandering around the Sinai Desert, they were obsessive about picking up after themselves. To date, archeologists have found no evidence of such large-scale wanderings. No discarded pottery. No ancient campsites. Bupkiss.

Even Bigfoot has left more evidence.

The Ten Commandments. Historically, the Ten Commandments found in the Old Testament were likely derived from earlier Hittite and Mesopotamian laws, with one key difference: These were supposedly backed by the Word of God, not just some two-bit Babylonian potentate. Which caused them to carry significant weight. The Commandments themselves have changed significantly over the years, and even today there’s a lack one-to-one correspondence between the Decalogues found in the sacred texts of the world’s many Judeo-Christian religions. Even the meaning of particular Hebrew words remains subject to interpretation. (e.g., the fifth/sixth Commandment, depending on your source, can be interpreted as “Thou Shall Not Kill” or “Thou Shall Not Murder,” which makes a difference is you’re a professional soldier…or a vegetarian.)

Happy Friday — and Thou Shalt Have a Great Weekend!

You'd HAVE to be drunk to do this to yourself.

In honor of St. Patrick’s Day and its adherents, how’s about a list of Fun Facts about the 10 Most Popular Types of Alcohol? Heck, that’s probably a suitable topic for ANY Friday….

———————————————-

1. Beer – Beer is most likely the world’s oldest alcoholic beverage. Mentioned in the earliest writings of ancient Egypt and Mesopotamia, it may have been brewed as early as 9,500 B.C., when cereal farming was first invented.

Ancient Egyptian Hieroglyph

2. Wine – There are approximately 75,000 different types of wine produced throughout the world.

Here are two of them. How many other colors can YOU name?

3. Vodka – Vodka is lighter than water. While a liter of water weighs 1 kilogram (the very definition of a liter), the same amount of vodka weighs only 0.953 kilograms.

Which is why it's perfect for heavy drinkers!

4. Gin – More classic cocktails are made with gin than any other spirit. The list of gin-containing drinks includes Gin & Tonic, Tom Collins, White Lady, Hanky Panky, Clover Club, Alexander, French 75, Gimlet, Vesper, Singapore Sling, Silver Bronx, Pegu Club and Bee’s Knees.

Not to mention Cotton Gin and Gin Rummy.

5. Rum – More than 80% of the world’s rum comes from the islands of the Caribbean. It was here than African slaves discovered that distilled sugar cane molasses made for a particularly tasty version of the centuries’ old libation.

"Yo-ho-ho and a dry martini" just wouldn't have sounded the same.

6. Whiskey – Ireland was the first country to make whiskey. It’s actually “beer wash” — that’s been distilled three times.

In Scotland, it's spelled "W-H-I-S-K-Y" -- because pronouncing the extra vowel takes away from valuable drinking time.

7. Scotch – “Scotch” is not a separate drink, but Scotland’s own home-grown version of whiskey/whisky. The country exports a stunning 1 billion bottles of the stuff every year. The United States is the world’s second largest importer of Scotch (120 million bottles/year). The largest? Importing 200 million bottles/year –France !

Because after drinking all that wine, a man needs a drink.

8. Bourbon – Named for the Kentucky county where it was first distilled in the late 18th century, bourbon is another variation on whiskey, one that includes at least 51% corn in its grain mix. It was named “The Official Spirit of America” by an Act of Congress in 1964.

Because Congress knows a thing or two about bourbon.

9. Tequila – Tequila is a 100% Mexican beverage (The Mexican government holds the exclusive rights to the name) developed by the Aztecs some 1,000 years ago. According to legend, it was “discovered” when lightning hit and fried an agave cactus and someone was brave (or thirsty) enough to taste the juice that spilled forth. Originally, the drink was so coveted its use was restricted to Aztec priests who required human sacrifices to ensure the gods would continue to provide a plentiful supply!

"Another round for my friends!"

10. Absinthe – This favorite of 19th century French Bohemians fell out of favor in the early 20th century, but has been making a comeback in recent years. Made from wormwood and anise, the original form of the drink was banned in Switzerland in 1910, in the U.S. in 1912 and then France itself in 1915 after being linked to madness — and murder!

Included so we can say, "Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder."

Happy Friday – and Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

]]> http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/15/all-about-booze/feed/ 0 http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/08/fun-with-the-evil-empire/ http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/08/fun-with-the-evil-empire/#comments Fri, 08 Mar 2013 17:36:52 +0000 allen http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/?p=2443 It was exactly 30 years ago today that President Ronald Reagan gave his now famous “Evil Empire” speech to the National Association of Evangelicals in Orlando, Fla. The speech was just one of many verbal fusillades The Gipper had hurled at the Soviet Union during his first term, but this one seemed to strike a particularly resonant note both at home and abroad.

The National Association of Evangelicals would like you to join their organization. In fact, they INSIST.

This was, of course 1983. The Soviet premier was former KGB chief Yuri “Chuckles” Andropov. The Russians, who had just had their asses handed to them in Afghanistan, were rapidly gaining influence in Central America. The threat of thermonuclear war was on everyone’s mind, fueled by films like War Games, The Day After and the upcoming Red Dawn (the good one). The term “Evil Empire” — actually coined by presidential speechwriter Anthony R. Dolan — not only encapsulated the West’s feelings about the Soviet Bear, but called to mind a certain cinematic Evil Empire that had so effectively struck back just three years prior. (If former actor Reagan could be counted on for anything, it was to bring a solid Hollywood allusion to his speechifying.) Who didn’t want to bring down Darth Vader?

How we saw the Soviet Union.

The term “Evil Empire” stuck like raw eggs thrown at a front door during a snow storm. The Russians were not pleased, countering that the United States was “an imperialist superpower” bent on dominating the world. That label seemed tired and worn, lacking any Lucas-ian pizzazz. Ultimately, Andropov died, Gorbachev came to power, the Soviet Union collapsed, Russia imploded and what for decades had been the greatest threat to world peace became content exporting both its seemingly endless supply of crude oil and equally endless supply of ruthless gangsters.

But during its heydey, just how evil was The Evil Empire? Did the USSR deserve its ignoble moniker, or was Reagan just employing political hyperbole? On this 30th anniversary of Reagan’s speech, let’s retreat to our dachas, put on a nice warm ushanka and knock back a refreshing shot of Stoli as we take a Friday Fun Facts look at “The Evil Empire.”

———————————————-

* The Soviet Union’s most brutal dictator was unquestionably Joseph Stalin (1878-1953). During his reign as Soviet Premier (April 1922 – October 1952), an estimated 20 million people died as a result of executions, gulag imprisonment, forced relocation, deportation and good old fashioned famine.

Well, at least he made the trains run on time. Oh, wait, that was Mussolini. Never mind...

* “Gulags” was a term used to describe the network of some 500 forced labor campus operated throughout the USSR between 1930 and 1960. The guglag system was the preferred destination for political undesirables, petty thieves and anyone who cracked wise about the Soviet system or its officials.

Gulag 178, here we come!

* If your crime didn’t warrant being sent to a gulag, there was always the Soviet psychiatric system. For decades, the country’s mental hospitals overflowed with “patients” whose mental disorders were characterized by blatant disrespect for government authority. After all, if you didn’t believe the Soviet system was the best in the world, you had to be crazy, da?

Soviet Horror Story - Asylum

* The Soviet Union was the first nation to make atheism its official state religion. Shortly after the Bolsheviks took power, they expropriated most church property, banned all public religious activities and killed as many as 1,200 Russian Orthodox bishops and priests. Individuals were still permitted to pray privately.

Which no doubt occurred with annoying regularity in the gulags.

* While the American government struggled with how to handle immigration, the Soviets were concerned with how to handle emigration. Too many Russians wanted out. Especially writers, filmmakers, scientists, academicians…and Jews (Who were considered an “ethnic minority,” and not full-fledged citizens). As late as the 1980s, numerous high-profile Russians were forbidden to leave the country less they give the impression the USSR was anything less than a workers’ paradise.

The Soviets even fought to keep HIM! (What a country!)

* During the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s, the Kremlin exerted direct control over many of its “satellite states,” particularly the Easterm Bloc nations it conquered during WWII. These included East Germany, Poland, Czechoslovakia, Hungary, Romania and Bulgaria. Any home grown attempts at autonomy tended to be met with the arrival of Russian tanks.

Russian tank commander looking for the Czech who "invited" then.

* In the Soviet Union, all mass media was subject to official review and censorship to ensure they towed the Communist party line. This job fell to a number of government organizations. Goskomizdat censored all printed material, including fiction and poetry (“There once was a girl from Kiev…”), Goskino reviewed motion pictures (“We give it four Red Stars!”), and Gosteleradio kept an eye on radio and TV broadcasting.

Russians stand in line to see their country's latest motion picture epic -- or buy toilet paper.

* Did the Soviets really plant “sleeper agents” in the United States, as depicted in the new FX series “The Americans“? Absolutely. Putting undercover agents in enemy society was a staple of both the Soviet and Western intelligence agencies throughout the Cold War. In fact, the Russians are still doing it. As recently as 2010, 11 Russian “sleeper agents” were caught on U.S. soil. But their targets are now mostly industrial secrets, not military intelligence.

Classic "sleeper agents."

Dosvedanya – and have a great weekend!

]]> http://www.fridayfunfacts.com/2013/03/08/fun-with-the-evil-empire/feed/ 0